One after the other and the rush between them

And you reach that point that you don't want to see coming: when you're all concerned and don't know exactly where you stand...

You try to get it out of your head and stop thinking only about what could be worse...but still you have that feeling that something will go wrong...somewhere, somehow...something will go wrong...

Usually it goes away once you discuss it and stop the analysis right before you go mad. And then you find your way back to yourself and the equilibrium you used to have.

...and...

They're all happening so fast, on all the levels and I can't quite catch up with them...and then I lose myself along the way and all my ideas go to waste because I didn't find the right time.

Still...I have my priorities in line, one after the other...guess it's the stability that gets me so scared...or the fear of losing it now that I have it on my fingertips.

What I have chosen for myself is rewarding...what has been happening for a while now is more than I would have expected last year...which makes me wonder:
"Is it real?"
"Will it happen from now on also?"
"Can I have that trust?"

...because I know it's worth it
...and I wanted it so much...for so long now

Who would have thought that it's so scary to get the things that you so much wanted?